No One's First & You're Next

How personal is too personal? Like what things should I not say? I don't know. I'm a hypocrite in all honesty. I give great advice i'll never be able to use myself, I think secrets are a way of the past when it's what my future paves the roads down with.

It's 6:04, and I decided not to take a bath before I go to school. I always decide on a shower before school depending if my hair is way too disheveled to manage or not. It may sound silly but it is my go-to idea and it's very helpful in saving and or consuming my time. Basically, today it's fine so I have 30 minutes to kill is all i'm saying.

School? It's fine. Same thing it's been since I started. My schedule is still not set in stone as I struggle to get all this senior-year-like-things down and out of the way. Like credits, and which classes I should be taking for sure to graduate, since Florida is lazy and just now decided to get my transcripts. There's actually a pep rally today. So that means no class. Score!

Home? It's fine. Same thing it's been since I started. I'm living through it, which is sad to say. I mean, i love them and it's not like their horrible, but there's just something about where i'm at that makes them seem somewhere else too, you know? Maybe you don't. That's ok. I don't really know either.

Me? I'm not fine. I'm as lost as I can get. Between you and me i'm working on myself. I've heard a lot of people say that before, but not like this. This is a complete reconstruction to get back to my foundation. But i'm not building a mosque where I used to be. Get it!? Obama joke. Anyways. I talked to the counselor and she said this is the first big step in dealing with depression. She said it takes every different times to deal with it and I know. And it's weird because It's not negativity, but there's something in the back of my head telling me i'm stick feeling this way forever. I'l learn to handle it better, and not tell anyone, but it'll always sit there. Oh! I've been having some crazy dreams lately. Maybe that means my brain is working? Idk.

It's 6:14. Gotta go.